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Writer's pictureJenna@northparkhypnotherapy

When fear turns into a phobia and how to conquer it.

Updated: Jul 14


We have all been there at some point in our lives. Something happens to us one day that causes us to feel an intense emotion or instant anxiety, and we don't want to experience that again. Perhaps we fall over in the supermarket in front of a group of people, which makes us feel embarrassed, or we present something at work and become so scared that we completely forget what to say and freeze. The likelihood is that the next time you go to the supermarket or have to present something at work, it is going to cause you to feel anxious and fearful that it might happen again.


Now, in most cases, even though it feels uncomfortable at first, you can work through this and the next time doesn't feel quite as bad. However, in other cases, this feels way too risky to try, and your anxiety becomes too overwhelming that you try to do everything in your power to avoid this situation or anything similar at all costs. This is a great strategy, especially if it's easy to avoid the thing or situation without much impact on your life. Problem solved, right?


Um, not exactly...


Our brains are hardwired for survival, and their number one goal in life is to protect you from any danger or threat in your environment, even perceived threats, anticipated threats, or threats that you think of when considering potential threats. So, any unpleasant experience that you have gets logged in the brain as a potential threat for future reference. When you avoid them, you reaffirm that there is an actual threat present because otherwise, why would you be trying to avoid it?


The more this happens, the more intense the response becomes the next time and the time after that, compounding the fear until it becomes so severe it may develop into a phobia. From that initial sensitizing event, we have now conditioned ourselves to fear that situation or thing. So we no longer go to the supermarket to try to avoid feeling embarrassed or don't want to go into work in case we need to present something else. The fear experienced every time you even think about trying to do this activates your survival mode, your anxiety takes over completely and causes such a terrifying stress response that it becomes too much for you to overpower. Your work or the supermarket becomes so triggering for you that over time, in extreme cases which are left unsupported and unresolved, develop from not wanting to go shopping or into work, to not being able to unpack food from a supermarket or leave the house. Dealing with fears, anxiety, and phobias sooner makes it a lot easier to overcome.


Phobias cause people to experience overwhelming and debilitating fear of a situation or thing that typically does not pose any real danger. It's the most common type of anxiety disorder and affects 2 in every 100 people in the UK. Phobias can be completely paralyzing and exhausting mentally and physically. It's also really important to remember that this is an automatic response to the situation or thing that's causing the fear, so even when you are trying to reason with yourself it's not going to work, the part of the mind that controls logic and your ability to critically assess the severity of the threat is not in control. Remember our brains are hardwired for survival and SURVIVAL trumps LOGIC.


Types of Phobias


There are three broad categories of phobias;


  • Specific or simple phobias that relate to a particular object or situation.

  • Social phobias that relate to an extreme fear of being in social situations that may cause embarrassment or humiliation.

  • Agoraphobia which relates to a fear of public spaces or crowded areas without an easy means of escape.


Common phobias that I work with;


  • Fear of flying (Aerophobia) - One of the most common phobias with studies showing its more likely in women than men and can be from several sources such as odd sounds, turbulence and fear of terror attacks.


  • Fear of Spiders (Arachnophobia) - A 2010 study showed spiders were among the most common sources of phobias in the world.


  • Fear of tight or crowded spaces (Claustrophobia) - One of the more well known phobias and one that often causes avoidance behaviours that significally impact a person's life. In its most severe form affects around 1.5 million people but around 1 in 8 people may be troubled by some agoraphobic symptoms.


  • Fear of dentists (Dentophobia) - Extreme dental anxiety affects 10% of people in the UK and found a variety of reasons from previous traumatic experiences, fears around gagging, needles and learned fear through other people to be the source.


  • Fear of driving a car (Driving phobia) - This exists on a spectrum with some people reluctant to drive and others that avoid driving altogether. A study found that it affects around 6% of adults between 55-70 years and linked this to poorer mental and physical health and a lower quality of life.


  • Fear of vomiting or others vomiting (Emetophobia) - Much more common than you may think and can present as a fear of you vomiting or others vomiting or both.


  • Fear of illness (Hypochondria) - Sometimes referred as health anxiety and has seen an increase in recent years, possibly linked to the impact of Covid-19. It's excessive worrying about medical conditions or health problems.


  • Fear of social judgement/interactions (Sociophobia) - Also referred as social phobia or social anxiety. Social fears vary widely and include fear of public speaking, fear of social situations or fear using public toilets. It affects more than 1 in 8 people at some point in their lives. A 2023 study also showed a strong correlation between social media use, communication capacity and social anxiety perhaps due to the lack of in-person interactions .



Ways to manage and overcome a phobia


When it comes to managing and overcoming a phobia, there are various strategies and techniques that can be employed to help individuals cope with their fears and anxieties.


One common approach is cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), which involves identifying and challenging negative thought patterns associated with the phobia. Collaborating with you to create a hierarchy of fears associated with the phobia and starting with less frightening situations to gently expose you. Each time changing the irrational thoughts to realistic ones and developing coping strategies such as deep breathing and relaxation techniques to help manage the anxiety.


Exposure therapy is another effective method where individuals are gradually exposed to the object or situation that triggers their phobia in a controlled and safe environment. Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, and mindfulness can also be beneficial in reducing anxiety levels and promoting a sense of calmness.


Hypnotherapy utilises both of these techniques but directly accesses the part of the mind which activates your anxiety and retrains it to respond differently to the situation or thing that's causing the fear. Usually noticing an improvement in a shorter amount of time because the mind cannot differentiate between real-life and imagination. This means you can use your imagination to practice being exposed to the phobia which your mind records as a real experience, reducing the risk of causing more anxiety and making the exposure process much easier to work through.

In addition to therapy and relaxation techniques, lifestyle changes can play a significant role in managing phobias. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and sufficient sleep can help improve overall mental well-being and resilience to stress. Seeking support from friends, family, or support groups can provide a sense of understanding and encouragement throughout the recovery process. It's important for individuals to be patient and persistent in their efforts to overcome their phobia, as progress may take time and setbacks can occur. However, combining various strategies and seeking professional guidance when needed, individuals can effectively manage and eventually conquer their phobias, leading to a more fulfilling and empowered life.


In order to do this, don't be so hard on yourself and self care needs to be a priority here. Remember this is an unconscious reactive response to your phobia so unless you are actively working towards addressing your fears and anxieties, it's done automatically. Another good thing to keep in mind is that we are only born with two innate fears (falling and loud noises) everything else is learnt, and anything that is learnt can be unlearnt.


Please let me know if you found this useful or would like to know more, and get in touch if you would like support with a fear or phobia.

















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